I asked for a Pandora bracelet for Christmas. I probably wont get one, but its ok. I just feel naked after having sold my favorite one. Having a new job is great but it is going to take quite a while to replace everything that I sold, and that was stolen from me.
It's taking everything not to cry about it. I should be used to struggle and sacrifice. I had to sell my jewelry and boots to make sure Luna and Spike could eat. If they had gone hungry I would have died.
I hate asking for help. It makes me feel weak. I probably should have asked. But of course it never comes without its price.
Recently I cant even say what I would like without someone biting my head off, or making me feel guilty for it.
I do everything on my own. I take care of everyone. I cant even say what I wish now without feeling guilty for wanting it.
I had a nice birthday at least. It was a nice surprise.
I cant really tell anyone about it though. And I feel if I bring it up the memories wont be received with the same love with which I thought it was given.....
That makes me feel lonely, but there's this saying again: Some of the best memories are the ones you cant tell anyone about.
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